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The Paradox of Holiness: I Also Struggle with This Too

I don’t know how many times I’ve wrestled with this. The more I desire to be holy, the more I realize how unholy I am. It feels like chasing the horizon—the closer I think I get, the farther it seems. I long to be holy because I want to draw near to God, but in doing so, I become painfully aware of my sinfulness. The closer I get to His light, the more my flaws are exposed. It’s like stepping into a bright room after being in the dark—suddenly, every imperfection is visible.

This often leaves me frustrated. “Will I ever be holy enough? Why does it feel like the more I try, the more I fail?” I’ve had moments where I felt like giving up, like holiness was an impossible standard that I would never reach. But over time, I realize I am  misunderstanding holiness. I am mixing up justification and sanctification—two essential truths that are related but not the same.

Justification is the moment God declares us righteous because of Jesus Christ. It’s not based on anything I do, but entirely on what Christ has done for me. As Paul says in 2 Corinthians 5:21, “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” This means when God looks at me, He doesn’t see my sin—He sees the holiness of Christ. This is why I can approach Him boldly, not because I have achieved perfect holiness, but because Jesus has already made me holy in His sight.

But while justification happens in an instant, sanctification is a lifelong process. It’s the journey of becoming more like Christ. And this is where the struggle is real. I see my sins, my failures, and sometimes I wonder if I’m making any progress at all. Sanctification isn’t about reaching perfection in this life—it’s about daily, sometimes painful, growth. Paul describes this journey in 2 Corinthians 3:18: “And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” It’s slow. It’s frustrating. But it is God’s work in me.

I’ve also realized that my discouragement often comes from trying to be holy in my own strength. I catch myself thinking, “If I just try harder, I’ll be more holy.” But holiness isn’t something I can manufacture. It’s not about effort alone—it’s about dependence. When I rely on my own strength, I forget that true holiness comes from Christ’s work in me, not my own ability to be perfect. The moment I shift my focus from “I need to be holy” to “Christ has made me holy, and He is making me holy,” I find rest. I stop striving for something that has already been given to me and instead live out the holiness I already have in Christ.

So, here’s the paradox: In Christ, I am already holy, yet I am still being made holy. I am fully accepted, yet still being transformed. I am complete in Him, yet still growing. This isn’t a contradiction—it’s the beauty of the gospel. I don’t pursue holiness to earn God’s favor; I pursue holiness because I already have His favor. And even when I feel inadequate, I can rest in the truth that He who began a good work in me will carry it on to completion (Philippians 1:6).

If you ever feel discouraged in your pursuit of holiness, know that you’re not alone. I struggle with this too. But let’s remind ourselves: We are works in progress, but we are also already holy in Christ. Let’s walk in that truth, rest in His grace, and trust that He is faithfully making us into His image.